Alright.... here's my post.

I AM SO PISSED OFF RIGHT NOW!... and hurt! My so called friends have once again left me out of the loop so to speak. This has been happening for a long time now... I can actually give you a date to within a couple months but for this rants sake, it's been years and leave it at that! I'm going to keep this intentionally vague so i'm sorry for those out there that actually read my blog. I'm not really sure there is a point to keeping it vague because the friends I'm talking about probably don't give a shit about what goes on in my life anyways. Just as long as it doesn't effect them or their plans! Well Fuck Them!! I'm tired of this shit!! I'm tired of ALWAYS having to make the effort!! I'm not even really sure how many close friends I actually have now that I think about it... aside from my wife who doesn't count (no offence meant hun but you know what I mean).... ohhhh.... a big fat goose egg comes to mind! I used to be everyone's friend!! The person everyone would go to because I could keep confidences. The person who could always make you laugh even when you were feeling like shit. I thought that's what best friends are for... WRONG!! When I hit a rough spot in my life, most of my friends bailed on me. Some stuck around and did their best to make things right... to help me through it. And for that I'm grateful. But soon afterwards, they started drifting away which you would think was logical for highschool friends and even public school friends as they grow up. But you see... they just drifted away from me... for the most part, the ties between THEM grew stronger but I was left out in the cold. Like I had some sort of fucking disease. Now and then I'd get a pity look, an invitation to a old best friends wedding, a phone call then and now... almost as a courtesy. But in a lot of ways that's worse. To find out about get togethers and how much fun they had... After the fact. Every now and then someone would slip and say "You should have been there" or "Where were you?!?". I just want to say "Next time, get your stories straight so I don't find out".

At first it didn't bother me too much and I figured if I make a greater effort, call people more, set things up more, I would be someone they would want to hang around with again and all this would go away. But it has been YEARS AND I'M FUCKING DONE WITH IT! Who needs close friends when they can so easily treat you like shit!!??! I've got one more thing to do with this lot and I'll do it like I do everything in life, to the best of my abilities. But when that's done, they can all piss off. I'm not going to be treated like that anymore by them or anyone else. No One Should.